How You Can Truly Believe Anything is Possible

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You may have been raised to believe, as I was, that “you can do anything you set your mind to.”

The power of positive thinking–with or without Dr. Norman Vincent Peale’s book–can land a job for you, get you out of debt, find the right and perfect relationship or simply get you out of a grumpy, woe-is-me state. Yes, it’s true.

Really? Can you really think your way into your dream job or financial freedom?

In a word: No

Beyond seeing the glass half full

I’m a glass half-full kind of gal. I say it all the time. Optimism is usually my default button but there are times when no amount of thinking something is good will make it so. Other factors come into play that are out of my control.

For some people, when a stack of bills is larger than the amount available in the bank account, the next logical step is to hit the “there’s not enough” button. It’s okay to include yourself in this group; I’ve been there much of my life.

It’s pretty tough to hold positive thoughts when your bank numbers are red.

Keep in mind, the bills and bank account are just one example of what I call “dis-spirited” thinking. (“Dis” meaning against, i.e, dishonor  or disrespect–in this case, “dis-spirit” means against spirit.)

If you’re a person new to recovery, you can be as positive as sunshine is to a tomato plant. But if your tomato plant is surrounded by pests and rotten soil, even the sun can’t keep it healthy. Same with you–if you take your newly sober self to places where there are pests and rotten soil . . .

You get my drift. You need more than positive thinking.

Attitude, Amplify and Action

However, if you add three key ingredients to positive thinking, your Positive Power skyrockets. Those key ingredients are: Attitude, Amplify and Action.

With attitude, it’s all about believing–truly believing–that whatever you seek is on its way to you. There can be no room for doubt.

  • You may not know how you’re going to get enough money to pay the bills, but you believe that you will.
  • You may think there are no jobs for your qualifications, but you believe you’ll get a job
  • You may not understand how a person can maintain recovery for a year or five or even 10 years, but you believe that it’s possible.

Amplify is about turning up the volume. Once you believe, take your positive thoughts to the next level by giving them voice. Speak what you believe to be true.

Call them affirmations in the Unity tradition, or yes statements or declarations, as Pastor Joel Osteen calls them, but the power of your voice coupled with your positive thoughts is explosive.

There have been times in my life when I’ve written positive statements and placed them in my car, on my bathroom mirror on on my computer screen so that I will regularly speak them aloud. It’s a powerful practice.

Finally, action is, as my dear friend Claudette used to tell me, putting feet under my prayers. When your thoughts are positive, you believe them with your entire being, you speak them aloud (with I AM statements!) and you then take action, there anything is truly possible. You have the power of the Universe behind you.

It’s a formula for sure success and one that I’m practicing right now. How about you? If you like this post, please share with your social media connections. As always, please send me a note or leave a comment because I love to hear from you!

Photo courtesy of conniemig

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Are You Living From Your Head or Your Spirit?

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“If I love with my Spirit, I don’t have to think so hard with my head.” ~ Peggy Cahn

Within a few days’ time, I received news that two people I know–one a friend and one a high school classmate–have a child with significant, life-threatening injuries as a result of horrific car accidents.

Another friend spent Thanksgiving on life support after she tried to kill herself, eerily close to the one-year anniversary of another friend’s suicide attempt (thank God she was not successful!).

Last week, I spent four nearly sleepless nights in a row coughing and blowing with the head cold of the century while contemplating the lives we make for ourselves.

I believe I now know the difference between living from my head or from my Spirit.

How to tell the difference between head and Spirit

My first sponsor, Shirley Rapp, used to talk to me all the time about how I didn’t know–couldn’t possibly know–anybody’s real story. “Girl,” she’d say, “you gotta just allow people to do the best they can because you don’t know their whole story. You’re just getting bits and pieces.”

Those situations I described? I feel immense sadness around all of them. What I don’t feel is judgment, because I don’t know the entire story behind any of them–no one can except those directly involved.

That’s how you know you’re living from your heart.

Shirley gave me a book way back then called Each Day A New Beginning, Daily Meditations for Women. I was 41 days into recovery. It’s a dog-eared copy now, and Shirley passed on a few years ago but I’ll always be grateful for the ways she modeled unconditional love, faith and service for me.

Each day a new beginning

Shirley talked often about taking my troubles to God, about how reaching out with love will always lighten my load. There’s a reading in the book on October 4 that speaks to that subject. Some excerpts:

The answers we’ve been searching for become known to us when we concentrate less on our problems and more on the gift of love we can give to the travelers we encounter today.

The solutions to our problems are seldom found in our heads. They burst forth from our hearts.

When we’re brittle, cold to others, we close off whatever messages being directed to us.

Our love for others softens us, making it possible for the words and ideas we await to permeate us.

Today is a new beginning

All this stuff about Spirit with a capital S? I believe Spirit to be a collection of all the small spirits–you, me, the next door neighbor, the grocery clerk and even the celebrity spiritual gurus–who decide each day that they want to plug-in. It’s a heart-to-heart thing, one heart talking the language that other hearts understand.

Between the time I started this post and the time I finished it, not only did the bulk of it disappear into the great Cyber Trashcan, so did a major ongoing work gig for 2015. That’s two lost clients in about 10 days. That’s most of my monthly income gone.

I think there’s a reason I had to rewrite this post. After the call, I immediately jumped into my head when I know that good stuff–opportunities, breaks, financial windfalls–comes from my heart, and ultimately, from Spirit.

I almost didn’t rewrite it, you know. Would anybody really miss a Mindful Monday post? Truth is, I would. I needed to write it so I could hear the message.

Live from your Spirit so you don’t have to mess with all that head BS. No need for thanks. Just send some love my way.

Photo courtesy of pippalou

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Are You Filled With What You Want to Spill?

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Years ago, somewhere in the rooms of recovery, I heard the question, “Are you filled with what you want to spill if you tip over?”

(If anyone knows the origin of this ditty, please share!)

The question came to mind yesterday as I pondered my finances. It’s the holiday season (which I love!) so there’s extra money going out. In addition to family gifting, I always get a charge out of anonymous and charitable giving and in doing the unexpected.

It was right about then that my mind had a bit of a seizure. Holy smokes! How can I possibly do it all? Clients are shifting, pulling back, others on the horizon but probably won’t make a decision until the new year . . . OMG!

What’s up with the limiting beliefs?

Instead of hyperventilating, I paused (as in, when agitated, we paused). Telling myself there might not be enough money is nothing more than a story. Since I love a good story, why not make it a story of abundance rather than one of lack?

Julia Cameron became my rock star hero in 1992 when she published The Artist’s Way. I learned to write morning pages and to do good things for myself on a weekly basis.

Twenty years later, she wrote another game-changer called The Prosperous Heart, Creating a Life of Enough. I swear I will kiss her ring if we ever meet.

This book is really a 12-week course in learning about abundance. It’s meant to change my attitudes and beliefs around money and when I bought it a month ago, I couldn’t wait to jump in.

The first week in my new journal dedicated to The Prosperous Heart exercises is dated November 23. Nothing since.

The point here is there is something comfortable about misery. My old friend John used to say we sit in our own s**t because it’s warm.

Dumping out those thoughts of lack

Say I’m walking the dogs, stub my toe and take a header onto the sidewalk. What will spill out of me? You guessed it. “Not enough. Won’t be enough. It’s always going to be like this. Why can’t I catch a break?”

Well, that’s not good. And certainly not something I’m proud of, human though it may be.

Okay, so what’s the next step?

I have to dump the ideas of not enough. Then I have to really, really wrap my arms around faith in prosperity.

Tweet: Without dumping my limiting ideas, there’s a block against creativity, which in my business, is highly detrimental. @bheretoday

How to begin?

“Prosperity at its root is a belief in a benevolent something–and a belief that that ‘something’ will guide us and guard us, ” Julia writes in the introduction to The Prosperous Heart.

“In my personal history, I have had tight fiscal times and times of greater abundance,” she continues. “I have learned to have a sense of safety based on my conviction that God will provide.

“Looking back, always, when a demand for cash has appeared, the supply of cash has appeared also,” Julia concludes.

Alrighty then. Now I know what I want to be filled with for the next time I spill my insides all over the sidewalk.

Photo courtesy of JEOMYEOL

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31 Christmas Quotes to Keep You Mindful

o CHRISTMAS QUOTES facebook 1024x682 31 Christmas Quotes to Keep You MindfulHappy December! For those of you who love Christmas like I do, welcome to the 2014 season. It is this time of year, more than any other, that helps me know that hope does spring eternal and love is the greatest reason to live.

However, for all the sparkling lights, boughs of pine scents and piped in mall music, many of you struggle through the holidays. You may even wake up every day in December grateful that you’re one day closer to January 2 because you’re worn out by family drama and/or exhibitions of addiction.

Regardless of your circumstances, know that you’ll survive. You’re tough and resilient. But when things get tough, turn to these 31 Christmas quotes–one for each day of December–and allow yourself to take a breath and mindfully remember the season is about love. And in the words of Dr. Seuss, “Maybe Christmas, the Grinch thought, doesn’t come from a store. Maybe Christmas… perhaps… means a little bit more!”

2. Christmas is not a time nor a season, but a state of mind. To cherish peace and goodwill, to be plenteous in mercy, is to have the real spirit of Christmas.  ~ Calvin Coolidge

3. Christmas waves a magic wand over this world, and behold, everything is softer and more beautiful. ~ Norman Vincent Peale

4. It is Christmas in the heart that puts Christmas in the air. ~ W. T. Ellis

6087e53d8a293c77740cda01943252f3 200x300 31 Christmas Quotes to Keep You Mindful5. If you haven’t got any charity in your heart, you have the worst kind of heart trouble. ~ Bob Hope

6. A lovely thing about Christmas is that it’s compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together. ~ Garrison Keillor

7. I love the excitement, the childlike spirit of innocence and just about everything that goes along with Christmas. ~ Hillary Scott

8. Christmas makes me happy no matter what time of year it comes around. ~ Bryan White

9. There are a lot of Grinches out there that would like nothing better than to take any references to religion out of the holiday season. ~ Ernest Istook

10. To perceive Christmas through its wrappings becomes more difficult with every year. ~ E. B. White

11. Christmas can be celebrated in the school room with pine trees, tinsel and reindeer, but there must be no mention of the man whose birthday is being celebrated. One wonders how a teacher would answer if a student asked why it was called Christmas. ~ Ronald Reagan

12. Christmas is doing a little something extra for someone. ~ Charles M. Schulz

13. This is the message of Christmas: We are never alone. ~ Taylor Caldwell

14. Christmas is a necessity. There has to be at least one day of the year to remind us that we’re here for something else besides ourselves. ~ Eric Sevareid

15. Christmas, my child, is love in action. ~ Dale Evans

16. Peace on earth will come to stay, When we live Christmas every day. ~ Helen Steiner Rice

17. I truly believe that if we keep telling the Christmas story, singing the Christmas songs, and living the Christmas spirit, we can bring joy and happiness and peace to this world. ~ Norman Vincent Peale

christmas is a precious reminder christmas quotes 300x111 31 Christmas Quotes to Keep You Mindful18. Remember, if Christmas isn’t found in your heart, you won’t find it under a tree. ~ Charlotte Carpenter

19. Christmas is the keeping-place for memories of our innocence. ~ Joan Mills

20. With this in mind, Ava tells herself to be present and celebrate the holiday instead of wishing it was over. After all, one is given only a certain number of Christmases in one’s life. ~ Elin Hilderbrand in Winter Street.

21. The month of December isn’t magical because it sparkles. It’s magical because it changes people’s hearts … at least momentarily. ~ Toni Sorenson

22. Christmas is best pondered, not with logic, but with imagination. ~ Max Lucado

23. Christmas is a whisper of peace and a sigh of hope on the lips of love.” ~ Richelle E. Goodrich

24. If my Valentine you won’t be, I’ll hang myself on your Christmas tree. ~ Ernest Hemingway, 88 Poems

25. Why not share with the world the way it is and tell them my feelings about my cat, and how I played with my kids, and how addicted to Christmas time I am, and the smell of pine needles and hearing my kids laugh. ~ Steven Tyler

26. You have to remind kids to stay connected to the meaning of Christmas. Sometimes it takes a little bit of effort, but it’s so worth it. ~ Caroline Kennedy

27. I think it’s important not to grow up too fast. I’m 26 now, and I still can’t wait for Christmas Day. The inner seven-year-old isn’t buried too deeply in me. ~ Laura Haddock

28. It is the personal thoughtfulness, the warm human awareness, the reaching out of the self to one’s fellow man that makes giving worthy of the Christmas spirit. ~ Isabel Currier

29. Want to keep Christ in Christmas? Feed the hungry, clothe the naked, forgive the guilty, welcome the unwanted, care for the ill, love your enemies, and do unto others as you would have done unto you. ~ Steve Maraboli, Un 31 Christmas Quotes to Keep You Mindfulapologetically You: Reflections on Life and the Human Experience

30. One of the most glorious messes in the world is the mess created in the living room on Christmas day. Don’t clean it up too quickly. ~ Andy Rooney

31. For the spirit of Christmas fulfils the greatest hunger of mankind.  ~ Loring A. Schuler

Please share these mindful Christmas quotes on Facebook and Twitter. Thanks much!

(Cover photo courtesy of The Huffington Post)

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Meet Recovery Carrier Becky Vance

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When it comes to recovery-related issues, Becky Vance is one of the most passionate people you’ll ever meet. We met nearly 10 years ago while working on the field services team for The Partnership for Drug-Free Kids, then known as The Partnership for a Drug-Free America. Our lives have changed drastically since 2005: while neither of us works at The Partnership any longer, we still live and work and breathe recovery–as a couple. Having Becky as the November Recovery Carrier not only honors the professional work she does, but expresses my loving gratitude for the many ways she models recovery for me in our daily lives together.

This is the 11th post in this Recovery Carrier series.

William White defines recovery carriers as “people, usually in recovery, who make recovery infectious to those around them by their openness about their recovery experiences, their quality of life and character, and the compassion they exhibit for those still suffering.” (www.williamwhitepapers.com, 2012)

When you hear the term “recovery carrier,” as it relates to addiction, what does that mean to you? Do you think you’re a recovery carrier?

A recovery carrier is someone who is not afraid to share the miracle of her own recovery with anyone. In fact, she is always looking for new opportunities to share her story withBvanceRally 150x150 Meet Recovery Carrier Becky Vance others, because she knows others will pass it on. Yes, I believe in my heart that I am a recovery carrier. People often tell me that my passion for recovery is infectious and I love that! I even joke that I am the poster child for recovery; if you think about it, that’s really true, at least to the people I meet that haven’t been exposed to recovery.

What makes you uniquely qualified to do the work you do?

It may sound kind of weird but I believe that God selected me to share this message of recovery. I did not wake up one day and say “I think I’ll share my recovery story at a breakfast of 100 corporate leaders to help promote the value of drug-free workplace programs.” Not at a time when I had a huge fear of public speaking! That particular event, which we called “Sex, Lies and Drugs in the Workplace,” turned out to be a sentinel event for me, and was the launching pad for the work I do today.

As a result of saying “yes” to sharing my story outside of a 12-Step meeting, which was absolutely terrifying to me at the time, I’ve been able to touch more lives than I could ever imagine.

Tell me how your personal story fits into why you do your work.

Maybe a better question is, How do you carry the message of recovery in your work life? I have been truly blessed for the past 26 years to have jobs that allowed me to share my recovery story with literally thousands of people.

(To read more of Becky’s interview, click Becky Vance 11-14)

Photo courtesy of AcrylicArtist

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