Understanding
1-1-1-1. Feels sort of magical to begin a new year with all ones, like it’s the first of many good things to happen this year. First, times four!
Twenty-10 was filled with every possible emotion that each seemed to run the gamut of simple to intense. Sometimes the emotions swung so swiftly one to another that I thought my mind might snap. Like all of you reading this, however, I made it through the rain and found myself protected, to quote an old Barry Manilow song.
My spiritual work through the holidays and on into the 12 Days of Christmas brought insight and understanding. I have a better understanding that there is an option about whether to let my emotions control me. I have dominion over my mind–the Power of Understanding, the word on this seventh day of Christmas–is proof.
My cell phone reset itself to factory settings last night, so I lost everything. Apps, ring tones, bookmarks, contacts, hours of work, just gone. I was perturbed and that’s a deliberately mild description.
This morning, I discovered that the power cord for my netbook no longer powered the computer. I’ve been running everything on my netbook for over a week, including these posts. I was irritated and that’s a deliberately mild description.
Late this morning, I had a bit of an emotional kick in the gut from a phone call to a family member. It didn’t go so well and I hung up feeling somewhat sad and helpless.
None of these things, not the electronics issues or the family one, constitutes abdicating my spiritual powers. The faculty of understanding consoles me. I understand that the awareness of beauty and peace and grace is available to each of us, if we choose to focus our minds in that direction.
I don’t deny that the business about my phone and computer angered me. In fact, I thought briefly about a foot-stomping tantrum. I also don’t deny that I’m concerned about the person on the other end of my phone call.
The power of understanding helps me to look around and beyond these incidences, however. I am powerless over them, just as I am powerless over the alcohol that once rules my life. For me, and this is just me, I try to not let my mind and emotions become stuck in the negativity. I know the stuff exists that initiates the feelings and emotions. I respect those feelings, I pray for the situation or people, then I try to move beyond them to the light of understanding where all things are possible.
As a Twitter friend wrote, God’s will will be done.
Happy New Year to all.



In July of 2009, I had an epiphany. For about a month prior, I was emotionally distraught, increasingly depressed and having serious thoughts of drinking again (after 18 years of sobriety).
I struggled to wrap my arms around what could possibly be wrong with me. I had all the trappings of a good life, one others would love to emulate--great job, dream house, traveling for a living, a life mate . . . the list goes on. 





My "resolution" this year is to put more spirituality in my life. One way this manifests is whether I have the faith and courage to make major changes: specifically to leave my 21 yr relationship. Part of leaving would be to move to a neighborhood where I can go to more meetings and be part of my meditation community. The relationship is not good in many ways–after 21 yrs we are not married, for starters. I absolutley believe HP wants me to have more of Him/Her/God in my life….but I am afraid….Thanks for posting your journey.
Hi Anon! I love your desire for more spirituality. I believe that those who seek will be guided. I also believe that when we do our best to completely align our will with our HP's, we receive the ability to make decisions (including non-decisions!) as well as the spiritual faculties to follow through. Remember that an acronym for FEAR is Face Everything and Recover. Blessings to you. BTW, please email me off-line if you'd like to chat further.