Several years ago, I woke one morning with that very question in my head. The thought scared me because I’m an optimistic, let’s-get-to-it person, even first thing in the morning. Plus, on that morning, in the middle of 2009, I was in my 19th year of recovery from addiction. So why the hell was I unhappy and unsettled?
Then a second question rose from my core: “Do you want to live the second half of your life as you have the first?”
If you’ve ever experienced those from-the-gut questions, seemingly from out of the blue, you know the stunned feeling that follows.
After the questions sink in, then what?
I knew that I’d been fooling myself while allowing everyone to believe that my life was grand. For years I let everyone believe that I was happy with everything as it was.
Yes, my life was good–and for most people, good enough. But where were life’s weight and depth and color? Where had my childlike sense of adventure gone? And what about my dreams? Stark reality told me I wasn’t as happy as I believed.
The decades were rolling by, and as I approached the end of my 40s, I realized, with a deep measure of sadness, that I was mourning a life of dreams unrealized. I was slowly dying inside.
I knew I had to make major life changes in order to reintroduce sanity into my life (I subscribe to the belief that the definition of insanity is doing the same things over and over again expecting different results.).
Then God-Universe-Spirit (I call it GUS) took that split second moment of hesitating surrender and prepared a path that was far too synchronistic to ignore.
In less than six weeks, I literally walked away from my life and entered a new one 600 miles away.
Was I scared? Yes, to the core. But my inner voice kept telling me to follow my truth, to believe in myself, to go for it! And in the months that followed, I lost count of the number of people who said, “Gosh, I wish I could do what you’ve done. You are so brave.”
Here’s the thing: You can do what I did.
You can follow your heart and live your life in full-blown color. Recovery is a gift that can only be opened with the key of surrender.
You can do the same. I know it’s not a simple decision, nor is it an easy one.
Think about these questions:
Is your life in recovery good or is it simply good enough? Are you happy with how you show up for your life?
If you’re looking to figure out what your purpose is, there are plenty of experts to help you. That’s not my area of expertise.
The posts you’ll read on this site are a beautiful mix of mindfulness, presence, grace and addiction and recovery.
Everything about my life–work, health, relationships, spiritual beliefs, and certainly my writing–is a direct result of entering recovery. I hope you’ll stick around to read some of my wacky in-recovery stories.
I’ll be open and candid about the glory as well as the challenges of being present to your life. I’ll be the first to tell you that some days are hard as hell. But you can be present to those days too. We’ll walk through them together.
Here’s my truth: I want to help you balance your recovery life “out there” with the peace of your being, the part that resides “in here.”
Are you ready for the adventure that’s waiting for you? Please join me at B Here Today and receive your copy of my free eBook, B Here On Purpose. Just complete the form below. And if you’d like to drop an email to me, I’d love to hear from you. My address is firstname.lastname@example.org.