Day 15 Check-in
I believe the truth I seek will appear when I demonstrate integrity in my life. The principle of “first, do no harm” is, for me, an impossible mission. My human ego and its accompanying drive to always come out on top prevents complete compliance with the principle.
Human fallibilities and frailties will be perpetual unwanted guests on my journey. Like my fellows in recovery, I sometimes engage in pre-sobriety destructive behaviors. Like the Big Book reads, I have been “a tornado roaring his way through the lives of others. Hearts are broken. Sweet relationships are dead.”
A few sentences later, these words are written, “The spiritual life is not a theory. We have to live it.”
For this reason, my gratitude list today includes the previously mentioned perpetually unwanted guests. I know they want to hijack my journey but my God is bigger than my ego and her tornadic pals.
Within the last year, I did do harm, massive harm. While I can’t change the past, I can be willing to let God point me to Presence.
My 30 Days of Presence practice is teaching me forgiveness. As I grow more comfortable being in the here and now, I find myself treating me better. Forgiving myself for harms done to others is an initial step toward living in integrity. Integrity leads to truth.
The spiritual life is definitely not a theory and it begins with peaceful presence.